Everyone has those days when time is short. This day was one of those. The doctor’s office was waiting and as usual I didn’t manage my time and we were down to the last possibly minutes if we were to arrive at the doctor’s on time.
My son, Matthew, age three at the time, has to go to the bathroom and not the quick one. I’m standing outside the closed bathroom door trying to wait patiently, glancing at my watch and cringing. I ask at least a half-dozen times, “Are you done?” and he replies, “Not yet.” I’m tapping my foot and staring at my watch again, like that is going to stop time or make my son do his duty any faster.
Finally, after I can’t tell you how long, but long, I knock and open the door. Suddenly I didn’t know whether to burst out laughing or throw up. There is Matthew sitting on the toilet, his shorts down to his ankles, his feet swinging and the toilet plunger stuck to his face. I scream, “What are you doing?” He quickly removes the plunger and my insides shake with laughter as his face has a red rim around it from the suction of the plunger. He looks at me all nervous and says, “I’m not doing anything.” Right.
As I wash his face with anti-bacterial soap, ten times over, I explain how dirty and gross a toilet plunger is and I explain what it’s used for. All the while I’m washing his face my stomach is revolting from the grossness of it. But I also want to burst out laughing at the sight he presented when I entered the bathroom.
Once we’re out the door and in the car, for the thirty minute drive, I burst out laughing more times than I can remember. It was one of the funniest things I’ve ever witnessed and trying to keep a straight face while explaining the seriousness of it to Matthew was hard.
When we got home I stocked the bathroom with cars and books and hid the, much too fun to play with, plunger.
All I can say is thank God for these moments. Or thank Matthew, who is now sixteen and horrified when I retell the story. I have laughed many times over the years from this and many other crazy things my four boys have done. Although this one tops my list for a well needed laugh, one I still laugh at after all these years.